Your parents are ageing. They are aging far away from you in the country they were born in. You don't live there. It is stressful--do you go visit them frequently? That is so expensive and it is hard to get the time off. Try to move them here? They keep saying they don't want to or cannot. What is going to happen when they inevitably cannot survive on their own anymore even with a strong community around them (if they are fortunate enough to have that)?
These questions are so common for immigrants like ourselves. Major life events can bring into focus even more how difficult it is to be far away from family. Not to mention cultural pressures of family members, friends, etc. asking why on earth aren't your kids here to take care of you in your old age? Why haven't they moved you to where they are living, then? Then, the familiar feelings of guilt arise.
It. is. exhausting.
However, you are not alone. Talking to someone who you don't have to explain every little detail to can go a long way. Someone who gets it. Someone who has similar life experience. You deserve to find peace. You deserve to be supported. Culturally sensitive therapy can help. It is worth reaching out.
